As we at Pullen & Bumber are familiar with your particular proclivities, we hope to interest you in a series of items that have just come into our possession. They were delivered to the auction house mere days ago, and I assure you that no other customers yet know…
Erotica
The Boy Band
You have to understand: I’m putty in the hands of sad Asian men. Ever since I saw Jet Li’s wife get killed in “The One,” I’ve been the world’s biggest [...]
Safety
“Care to buy me a drink?”
“No.”
Sandra blinked. Clearly this man had not learned the script, and without the script she didn’t see how he thought he had a chance. His [...]
As You Desire Me
Today’s Numero Uno has a prepub fetish, so naturally I put on the prostitot body. He comes into my velvet-draped workplace and sees a twelve-year-old, tall for her age, with [...]
Gemini
You’re on your knees in front of our neighbor from across the way (but never for him, no; that’s not for him). You’re on your knees and have been for [...]
Sexes in the City
It was weeks before I dared expose my skin in the privacy of my new home. And, even then, only parts of it. My hands, my crotch. While looking at [...]
The Cave of the Winds
Carlin stood on the mountainside and studied the cave entrance at her feet—a long, narrow slit of shadow between two sandstone slabs. Afternoon sun painted the stone gold, and scrub [...]
Redemption Tattoo
The door rattled violently on its hinges in the haste of Paul’s exit. As every head in the restaurant turned to stare, I found myself once again having to ask [...]
Pervertable
This isn’t where I expected you to take me when you asked if I wanted to go shopping. I was thinking about the other side of town. About the kind [...]
Private Land
“It doesn’t look like much,” Clark said, squinting, one hand shading his eyes. “Anyway. Not much. Surely the owner wouldn’t mind?”
Lochinvar Luck and Shandy were certainly eager to try it; [...]
How to Torture a Vampire
He wants pain. Pain is his thing, what he needs, the thing he begs for. Down on his knees with tears in his eyes, he implores me to find a [...]
In the Apple Tree
In the apple tree, in the dark, I am waiting for my moment.
I am spread on my stomach across the widest, flattest branch, telephoto lens at the ready. And I [...]